So, You've Stumbled Upon My Blog!

Congratulations! Buy yourself a donut! The gingerbread house is across the road and to the right! But seriously, you probably stumbled upon my blog because you have no life. But that's okay! I have no life, either. Upon selling my soul to the devil after becoming a self-proclaimed atheist...well, the rest is history, but you know they'll make a movie about me some day. I try to update my blog everyday, but *sigh* things have just been so busy. Just a few general things about me:

1) I love to make people laugh! If I'm not funny, please tell me. There's nothing worse than an obnoxious, un-funny person.

2) I had one extra toe during birth.

3) I may curse.

4) My absolute favorite people are my boyfriend Dan, my family, my awesome friends, my internet stalkers, Jon Stewart, Kristen Wiig, Roz Chast, and just about anyone out there who's funny.

5) I make short films for a living, as well as some jewelry and art.

6) I'm a Liberal, a Democrat, and an Atheist.

7) Support the arts, por favor!

8) I really wish I was of cool descent, but I'm not. The only thing I have to brag about was that my great-great-great-great-great grandfather came on the Mayflower, and my other great-great-great-great-great-great grandfather was a Native American who greeted my other great-great-great-great-great grandfather when he arrived on the Mayflower in Plymouth Rock. Whew!

9) My full name is Jennifer Carolina Ryland, but I go by Jennie.

10) I love cats.

11) I tried singing, and I sucked.

12) I'm obsessed with history! I gotta admit, I love everything about it, so you'll realize most of my posts have historical allusions in them. I also have a fetish for Victorian fashion. Damn.

13) I really, really, really, really want to visit the Sandwich islands, because I find the Earl of Sandwich to be a humorous name.

14) During college (graduate of Columbia, nbd), I took a year in Russia to study Russian and learn its history. The only problem is that I only remember the words for "potato", "beet", and "vodka".

15) The only other thing I can think of is that I used to play piano.

16) Oh, and I studied Spanish in high school. I was a beast.

17) Crap. I meant to say that I visit my parents in Florida every year. Hi, mom! Dan likes them fine, but he was weirded out the last time they asked to purge him of his sins. They're pretty devout, and he's half-Jewish, half-Atheist. We'll make a lovely family.

18) I am currently going through school to become a teacher.

19) I'm working on a novel.

20) I'll never tell you what my novel is about.

So now you officially know everything about me. Great! Just send me a list of things about you, your ID, and Social Security number. I know we'll be great friends.

With much love,

Jennie